“Don’t ever let somebody tell you, you can’t do something. Not even me.”-Will Smith playing Chris Gardner in The Pursuit of Happyness
This movie is in my DVD collection. Chris’ story is a wonderful example of how talent, determination, perseverance and grace can pay off. This is one of the most powerful moments in the movie. It’s also a wonderful example to show the world that many African-American men are loving, commited and present fathers.
In my booth at Passport 2 Success in Greensboro, NC
Today, I had the honor and privilege of volunteering as a Career Coach for the WFMY Passport 2 Success event. This was my second time
WFMY Passport 2 Success 2010
working with this event and I continue to enjoy being able to contribute to others in such a significant way. I really enjoyed helping job seekers by providing suggestions, feedback and resources to assist in being better prepared for their searches. Two of the things I saw consistently were lack of clarity about what type of job is actually desired, and lack of confidence that someone would hire them. It always hurts me when I see a person convince themselves that they are not worthy or valuable. It’s my life’s purpose to help people, specifically women, to acknowledge their worth and know their value. That’s one reason I’m so grateful to be able to give back by participating in events like this.
If you are looking for a new job, here’s my advice:
Prepare for the interview by researching the company, do NOT go into an interview unprepared
Ask questions of your interviewer, you can NOT possibly know everything about the company or the position, ASK QUESTIONS
Understand your worth and why you will be a valuable employee to the company
Let yourself grieve the loss of your last job, if you don’t do this your negative feelings are likely to show through as you present yourself
Know your strengths, and be able to discuss them with specific examples (if you can include numbers like how much you saved the company, etc that even better)
Know your weaknesses, and be able to describe how you work around them
Be able to explain how you benefited your previous employer (why was the company better off because you worked there)
Focus on personal grooming and hygiene (it shouldn’t have to be mentioned, but unfortunately it NEEDS to be mentioned)
Smile and be confident that you are the best candidate for the position
If you believe you must wear a black & white outfit to the interview, please make sure it helps you stand out in a good way, not blend into the background and become very forgettable as a job candidate. If everyone wears black and white, how will they remember you specifically. Your purpose is to stand out above the rest of the applicants and prove to the employer that you are the best fit for the job and the company culture.
In front of my booth at Passport 2 Success in Greensboro, NC
I believe that success leaves clues. With that in mind, I study as many people as possible that have attained the type of “whole life’” success to which I aspire. That’s why I’m including the Celebrity Spotlight Feature in Phenomenal Life and Career Newsletter. It’s my extreme honor to feature our country’s First Lady as the first celebrity to be profiled.
Over the last several years I’ve had the pleasure of learning about the Phenomenal Woman that is First Lady Michelle Obama. During that time, I’ve adopted her as one of my mentors and role models. I aspire to be as gracious, stylish and confident as she appears to be.
In my opinion, Mrs. Obama is living proof that yes we can have it all, love, family, career, happiness and fulfillment if we are willing to work at it. Here are just 3 of the secrets to success I’ve learned from her:
1. Choose your priorities and let them shape your life.
“And in my own life, in my own small way, I’ve tried to give back to this country that has given me so much. That’s why I left a job at a law firm for a career in public service, working to empower young people to volunteer in their communities. Because I believe that each of us–no matter what our age or background or walk of life–each of us has something to contribute to the life of this nation.”
2. Being classy and intelligent are always fashionable and never go out of style.
“One of the lessons that I grew up with was to always stay true to yourself and never let what somebody else says distract you from your goals. And so when I hear about negative and false attacks, I really don’t invest any energy in them, because I know who I am.”
3. Self-care is not selfish, it’s smart; because, it refuels you so you can continue to give to others.
“I have freed myself to put me on the priority list and say, yes, I can make choices that make me happy, and it will ripple and benefit my kids, my husband, and my physical health. That’s hard for women to own; we’re not taught to do that. It’s a lesson that I want to teach my girls so they don’t wait for their “aha” moment until they’re in their 30s like I was (laughs). Maybe they can experience it a little earlier.”
My challenge to you is to take an assessment of your own life and career choices. Do they truly reflect who you are and your current priorities? Or are they more like some random mix of outcomes created by default? Let’s take a cue from Mrs. Obama, and be more intentional about how we design our lives. Many women spend more time designing their outfits than they do on designing their lives. Please don’t be one of them.
Every New Year, women start with the highest of hopes and the best of intentions to transform ourselves and our lives. We believe that the fresh start of a new calendar will be the secret ingredient we need to help us start living the life and lifestyle of our dreams. You scribble down a wish list of goals, objectives and resolutions that you hope will magically transform everything for you. Or, perhaps you belong to the other school of thought that has officially said “bah humbug!” and giving up on resolutions all together. Because you know that in the past they’ve never worked for you.
Having been on both sides of this debate over the years I will admit that I’m back in the game, on Team Resolution! However, this year I’ve learned from what didn’t work in the past and modified my approach. Listed below are the Top 5 goals that women have indicated are important to them during 2010. Do any of these sound familiar? Did these make your list?
Lose Weight/ Get in Shape
Spend More Time with Family/ Improve Marriage
Career Advancement/ Get a Raise
Get & Stay Organized
Get out of Debt
I’ll admit that more than half of these are on my list, along with a laundry list of others that support them. I’ve set specific goals for each of the following areas: health, relationships, money, spirituality and self. As I mentioned, this year I’m using a different strategy to achieve my goals and track my progress. It’s really pretty simple.
First, assess where you started, using a clearly defined measurement system. This will be very important as you go through the year. If you’re like most of us mere mortals you’ll have ups and downs, success and setbacks. If you have not used an objective method to measure your starting point and successive results, you are likely to underestimate your overall progress when you go through a “down cycle.” We don’t want that!
Second, break down the goal into smaller time frames; for example, quarterly or monthly. The mistake I’ve made in the past was to only set an annual goal, and then being the recovering procrastinator and perfectionist that I am wait until November or December to try to complete everything on my list! I’m sure that no one else has fallen into that pattern, and I’m the only one. But, just in case you can relate, I now recommend “chunking” your goal into bite sized morsels! They are much tastier that way, rather than bingeing at the buffet line like this is your last meal.
Finally, revisit your goals throughout the year to see if they are still relevant to you right now. You may have changed and your life may have evolved to the point that what used to be very important to you is now irrelevant. If so, cut yourself some slack and cross it off of your list. Ah, what a feeling!
So, despite which side of the matter you find yourself. You may let yourself get caught up in the hype of the New Year’s season and declare your life altering resolutions. Or, you may be more rational about it and merely set performance goals and objectives. Either way, these simple steps will help you to achieve the results you desire with minimal stress and maximum reward.
Universal Possibilities Challenge: Set at least one goal for each of the following areas of your life: Health, Relationships, Money, Spirituality and Self. Make a commitment to yourself. And, strive to accomplish these goals within 3 months.
Life is what we make it. Always has been, always will be.
Grandma Moses
I recently read the book Now, Discover Your Strengths by Marcus Buckingham and Donald Clifton. The primary premise of this book is that the “Rock Stars” in any Industry or Position do not waste their time or efforts trying to perfect their weaknesses. Instead, they know that the greatest opportunity for growth and excellence is in building upon their existing strengths, and then managing around their weaknesses. This way of thinking is definitely against the grain and the opposite of how most of us were indoctrinated. That’s why I was initially doubtful. Never the less, I am now a pom-pom carrying “Strengths-based Cheerleader.” I’ve seen the light and will stop trying to become perfect in every area. (Well, I’ll try to stop. After all “My name is Wende, and I’m a recovering Perfectionist.” Admitting it IS the first step!)
The book was recommended to me last year by someone I respect, so I added it to my list of books to read and didn’t think much more about it. Then, it was mentioned recently by my mentor. So, I decided to buy it and dug in. Along with the book comes a code to take an online assessment to determine your top 5 talent profiles (the areas that can most easily become your strengths). The authors refer to these as your signature themes. Before you fall asleep on me, keep reading!
How can I explain the experience of receiving my 5 signature themes and reading about them in this book? It was like having someone you just met describe you to a tee and tell you about your interests, behaviors and tendencies. The experience was amazing! The theme descriptions also helped to affirm for me that the very purpose that I believe I was created to fulfill is also the one that God gave me the natural talents to achieve. Have you have ever experienced a momentary period of wondering if you are crazy for attempting what you are working toward? If so, then you know how wonderful it is when you get a divine confirmation that you are indeed on the right track!
So, obviously I wholeheartedly recommend this book. But, even more, I urge you to take action and use your knowledge, skills and natural talents to move you ahead in the ways that are most important to you. I’ve heard the statement that the richest place on earth is the graveyard, because so many people pass away with all of their wealth still in them. They were too fearful, lazy, etc to mine the gold that was placed within them by their Creator. I don’t intend on living or dying with my wealth of talent going untapped and underutilized. I hope you can say the same thing.
My challenge to you is to identify your natural talents. Then, decide how you will grow them into amazing strengths that will catapult you to the success (in your personal and professional life ) that you desire and deserve. Doing this will not only help you, but it will also ensure that you are giving back to society from the place of unlimited wealth that is within you. That’s what I call a “win-win!”
During November 2008, I received a death threat from a former employee that had been laid off from the company. Since I was the Human Resources Manager, he viewed me as the cause of his problems. Receiving such a threat surely prompted me to reflect on where I was I my life, what I was doing and what I was not doing. As a result of that turning point in my life, I chose to resign from a job I enjoyed and start my own personal and professional development company.
Don’t get me wrong, this decision was accelerated due to the traumatic event, but that event was not the cause of my decision. For years I have wanted to own my own business and achieve success on my own terms. But, alas, the comfort and perceived security of employment kept me in a holding pattern. Can you relate? So I saved up my money, knowing that one day I would “step out on my own.” The only thing I didn’t know is when and how it would happen. For some reason, it seems like I thought there would be some huge obvious sign to let me know that “Now is the time!” But that never happened. What I did get was a quiet and peaceful voice that said, “Wende, it’s time now. You’re ready!”
Well, that was a total shock to me because I certainly didn’t believe that I was ready. Although I had completed the training I needed, created a financial reserve and had an idea of how I wanted my business to run, I still felt unprepared to actually act on it. But that is where my faith came into the picture. I knew for a fact that I could not succeed in business (or in life for that matter) without God’s help and guidance. So I took a massive leap of faith and trusted that where God provides a vision he also provides provision.
After several years of working with the people that I had grown to know as my “work family” I submitted my resignation in January 2009. My choice was not based on running away from something unpleasant, but rather on running toward something new and exciting. In the time since I’ve started Universal Possibilities LLC, a personal and professional development company for women, I’ve had the opportunity to reach and help new people! The road of entrepreneurship gets bumpy at times, but whenever I start to wonder if I made the “right” choice. I reflect on the women that I coach and know that I would not want to be doing anything else with my life but what I am doing right now. How many people do you know that can say that about their job or business? Can you say it about yours?
If you would like some guidance and a step-by-step process to achieving the career success that you desire, then consider registering for my upcoming Phenomenal Woman, Phenomenal Career Coaching Program. My experience and insight as a Human Resources Manager, Certified Career & Life Coach, and working Mom can help you to clarify your career goals and create a personalized strategy to achieve them. The program is conducted over the telephone, so your geographic location is never a factor.
Call Certified Career Coach & Life Coach Wende Sanders, MS, CC today at 336-407-3828. See how I can help you or your group reach your highest potential in your work and beyond.
Universal Possibilities LLC serves Winston Salem, Greensboro, Durham, Raleigh, Wilmington & Charlotte Areas in North Carolina (NC)
“Creating the Lifestyle You Thought was Out-of-Reach”
Green Policy
Being environmentally conscious is very important to me in my personal life, so it was only natural to make “green practices” a part of my business as well. Universal Possibilities LLC employs paperless systems when possible, uses recycled paper when paperless isn’t possible, reduces energy consumption and recycles everything that can be recycled. I believe that businesses as well as individual citizens have a responsibility to make sure we leave a world that is safe, sustainable and beautiful for the generations that are to come. I’m very honored to run Universal Possibilities LLC as a green company.
